Right now, you are becoming either cynical or successful. One thing will determine which you will become. HOW YOU HANDLE HURT WILL DETERMINE IF YOU BECOME CYNICAL OR SUCCESSFUL. There are 3 ways to respond to hurt. You need to understand how to navigate this and take the path to success…
My last post explained why this is so important. Read it here.
You will become hurt in ministry leadership and in life in general. Many times this hurt will catch you off guard. Someone will say or do something or NOT say or do something that will hurt you. I’ve found that many times in my own life, the people who have hurt me had no idea or intention to do so.
There are 3 ways you will respond.
- GOING INWARD
Going “inward” means retracting inside yourself. It means withdrawing from people. When someone does this, they can only think of how this hurt has affected them. There’s no space to think about where the other person is coming from. This often leads to feeling sorry for yourself.
People that go inward when hurt and wounded often implode emotionally, relationally and/or spiritually. Many times people around them don’t even know they are struggling.
While there is a good healthy side to self-reflection and perspective, if done in an unhealthy way, someone who goes inward when hurt will isolate themselves through loneliness.
- GOING OUTWARD
Going “outward” means reacting outside yourself. It means projecting towards people. When someone does this, they express themselves outwardly for the world to see. When this is done in anger, it can be expressed by lashing out towards others that may or may not have anything to do with what occurred to cause the hurt. This often leads to other people being hurt from the outward response as a result of the hurting person. Maybe you’ve heard the phrase, “hurting people hurt people.”
People that go outward when hurt and wounded often explode emotionally, relationally and/or spiritually. Many times people around them become casualties from their unhealthy responses.
While there is a good healthy side to connecting with others and not keeping the hurt all inside if done in an unhealthy way, someone who goes outward when hurt can also isolate themselves by driving people away.
- GOING UPWARD
Going “upward” means going vertical instead of horizontal in responding to hurt. It means taking the pain and through prayer expressing and surrendering this to God. When someone does “goes vertical,” they find God’s strength which is beyond anything they can tap into on their own. Going upward brings a sense of peace and serenity as it is a reminder that God is the ultimate solution when we are hurting and in pain.
People that go upward when hurt and wounded grow emotionally, relationally, and spiritually. Many times people around them become impacted in a positive way by their healthy response.
When you are hurt, let me encourage you to go “upward” in your response. Don’t take things personally and allow your heart to receive the healing that the Holy Spirit can offer you that no other solution can bring.
Remember 1 Peter 5:7 “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.”
Keep on keeping on!
Jeff Eckart, CEO
Never The Same
© 2021, Never The Same